What does gray hair tell us in men and women?
What about women and gray hair? The emotional reaction of women to the
appearance of their first gray hairs is more dramatic than that of men. In addition to
asking themselves a thousand similar questions to those of men, women carry the
historical cultural obsession with beauty.
While men mature, women age. The ideal of beauty and youth, reinforced for
centuries in women, means that everything related to aging is assumed to be
shameful.
The popular saying “a hair from the tail,” used to refer to something of little
importance, does not apply when talking about hair. No. The truth is that, if there is
something that is highly valued socially, even if it is sometimes not admitted, it is
female hair.
For women, changing their color when the first gray hairs appear is a very old
demand. This custom dates back to ancient Greece and the Romans.
Today, it is a global market primarily for female beauty products, which is
constantly expanding. In 2019, this market reached over 29 billion dollars, with
popular colors like blonde, brown, black, and red; and it grew to over 40 billion
dollars by 2023.
But this dye market also reflects society. In fact, until today, 99% of it has been
oriented towards women since 1956 when the Clairol brand launched the first
home hair dye kit in the United States.
Is there a difference between a man with gray hair and a woman with gray hair?
Social Mandate
Gray hair or no gray hair? This dilemma is not new.
When a woman is criticized for not dyeing her gray hair, it responds to the social
demand to not age and maintain beauty. A demand that is often not fully
acknowledged, but dye companies foster it, and women consume them.
Why does this happen? Psychologist Carolina Valderas, from the U. Autónoma,
Temuco campus, explains that historically, women have been defined by two
highly demanding ideas: the aesthetics of youth and motherhood. “The value
placed on femininity has always been focused on the body, a body subject to
socially defined standards, a beautiful woman with high reproductive potential,” she
clarifies.
“Any woman’s body that deviates from these established norms will be deemed
illegitimate, leaving women in a true bodily captivity. This leads them to make
efforts to transform or self-regulate their body image, aiming for the desired social
acceptance, as we grow older, we move further away from the imposed
stereotypes,” adds Valderas.
Thus, physical beauty has a greater influence on the lives of women than on men,
and aging is something painful for women—how many times have we heard that a
woman is not asked her age or that after thirty, she no longer celebrates her
birthday?
Gray hair in women is associated with neglect, a lack of femininity, and even
carelessness. This does not happen with men, who in some cases are told, “gray
hair suits you.”
It is the social demand not to age, which is imposed more on women and by
women in our society. It’s a very clear social concept, where psychological,
sociological, and cultural factors are constantly at play. There shouldn’t be a
problematic transition from adulthood to old age, but the reality is that the words
“old,” “old man,” and “old woman” have a negative connotation and are linked to
the degradation of the human being, not to their life experience.
These concepts of stereotypes and prejudices lead to discriminatory behaviors
toward older women with gray hair, which logically has personal and social
consequences, as it directly affects the quality of life of women with gray hair and
conditions them to dye their hair.
The prejudices imposed on the bodies of women with gray hair are difficult to
break. Our culture promotes learning negative feelings about aging. It fosters
anxiously observing signs of decay and decline in the body. For these reasons,
many women, starting at forty, embark on a new path of physical and intellectual
exercise and, mainly, a makeover to look younger and more beautiful.
It’s difficult to accept gray hair and old age, especially when, in the 21st century,
not only men but even women say there’s another way. An artificial way, whose
market has grown exponentially in recent decades,: plastic surgeries, which are
much more invasive than dyeing hair, and with which one can really feel and look
beautiful with a younger face.
It’s important to understand that there are no operations for the soul, self-esteem,
or attitude, and the years keep passing. It’s not about being against surgery,
dyeing, or deciding not to do it, but in favor of the freedom to choose, accepting
your process or wanting to touch up, but always making your own decision, not one
imposed by who-knows-who.
Why are gray hairs well-received in men and not so much in women?
Gray hair in men and women: It’s not the same
According to the latest data, 6 out of 10 women dye their hair, while only 1 in 10
men do. Considering there are many more men with gray hair than women, it’s
easy to see that women are much more concerned about gray hair than men.
Why?
It’s due to the cultural concept of feminine beauty ingrained in our society since the
ancient Egyptians. Within these aesthetic and beauty canons, coloring hair
unnaturally has always been imposed on women with the appearance of the first
gray hair. Because gray hair is associated with being an older woman, and this is,
until today in our society, not attractive.
You’ve probably heard phrases like:
“Gray roots, she’s a woman who doesn’t take care of herself.”
“At a certain age, it’s better to choose lighter hair dyes that make you look younger.”
“Gray hair makes you look older.”
“Gray hair is associated with old age.”
“It’s normal for a man with gray hair not to dye it, but a woman should dye it.”
“A gray-haired man is attractive and interesting, not a gray-haired woman.”
And many more.
Clearly, we can observe a series of prejudices about what gray hair means for
women compared to what it means for men. What do you think? I invite you to
share your opinion.
I believe it’s a socio-cultural issue that has been with us for centuries. But with
advances in information, women now have all the resources and knowledge to
decide which option to choose. Remember, just like with men, hair is a component
of your image, and whether dyed or not, what is admirable in women is the total
package, where personality stands out.
Today’s women, with the knowledge available to them, have the freedom to
choose whether to follow these canons or not. It’s up to their personality and
thoughts.
If you decide to dye your hair, I invite you to try Melanobar.
